Ladies, I'm so upset at the last minute my FH brother and nephew decided to drop out the wedding. I just can't believe peoplewill tell you one thing and then do something else especially family me. I can understand why his nephew drop out he was involve in a car accident and was injury pretty badly, but his brother has no excuse except he took his kids to Disney World last month and now he can't afford to fly (whatever a??hole). I’m starting to feel like this wedding is doom. Well thanks for letting me vent...I better pray before I hurt someone LOL
Hang in there Queenbee. One thing I found out in the planning stages of my wedding is that no one was as happy about my wedding as I was. People will pull all kinds of nonsense. I had a bridesmaid drop out of the wedding. The thing is she never told me she was dropping out. My bridal party gave me drama all the way up to the end. Some of my husbands family members told us they were coming to the wedding, we paid for them and they DID NOT show up and didn't call to explain why. I was fuming with them. Then I realized that I had my husband and that's all that mattered. Don't let your future brother-in-law or anyone else for that matter rain on your parade. I know it's getting close to your big day and it seems like they are really inconsiderate, but honey you already have what matters most. I wish you all the best and try not to let these people stress you out. All the best my sister.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Posts: 1885
From: Maryland, Florida after we're married!!
Re: I'm so upset
Posted on: 06/11/2008 01:45 PM
Sweetie, being a wedding planner has taught me one thing, bridal parties could be amended. I say forget them and find 2 local people to replace them. That way, it would only cost them the price of the tuxedo rentals. You do have a month ahead of you and that's plenty of time.
Sister listen, at the end of the day, as long as you have your husband, that's all that matters, even if no one else shows up. You're at the stretch point sister, try not to be too stressed out, and vent anytime, that's what we're here for.
I agree with what Rhony & Diva G both said...
I had no cooperation from my entire bridal party up until THE DAY of the wedding-so don't let this discourage you--move forward without them--it's their loss!!!!!!!!
Girl we had someone drop out the day before the wedding. DH goes to pick up his tux and the salesmen mentions there is one tux that hadn't been picked up yet. DH calls his friend who doesn't answer phone so DH pays for tux because he so sure his man will pick it up from him later and give him his money back. By the time we get to rehearsal his boy still hasn't called him back and doesn't even bother to come to rehearsal. DH had a cousin who flew in from California that was at the rehearsal so he filled in for our missing groomsman. The missing groomsmen finally calls hours after the rehearsal to say he doesn't have money for tux and was too embarrased to speak up earlier. DH and him exchange a few choice words and Dh's cousin decides to try on tux which to our surprise fits him perfectly. He even already had a pair of ivory shoes he planned to wear to wedding. We refused to accept him paying for the tux but he ended up leaving the money for it anyway. I share my story to let you know God ALWAYS has a ram in the bush and although things aren't going according to your plans, God's plans for you always work out fine. Just wait and see.
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
Posts: 1820
From: Tallahassee, FL (Originally Ft. Lauderdale, FL)
Re: I'm so upset
Posted on: 06/11/2008 02:35 PM
queenbee, so sorry for your troubles...The ladies here have some incredible but as you can see, very similar situations....We had a very small bridal party so we didn't have problems, but we did have problems with the guests....we paid for all these family members to attend (on both sides), and these folks even RSVP's or we called them and got the RSVP on the phone....even the ones who had the nerve to ASK ME if they can come to the wedding were paid for, well of course we had about 20 no-shows, including the one who asked and I reluctantly gave in and invited her....But you know what? Yes we ate some of the cost with the no-shows, and if pissed us off because our budget was so tight, we put family over many of our understanding friends....and these "family" members ditch with no explanation! Our friends could have and would have come in their place....! But I feel like in the end....everyone who God wanted there WAS there, and thats that......Whoever missed out was definitely sorry they didn't make it happen!
Thanks Ladies,
You are truly a blessing and I'm not sure what I would do without you gals. I know that everything is going to work itself out, sometimes it just a little frustrating when you think that you can depend on someone and they let you down. My FH said, no big deal but I know deep down inside he’s hurt by the whole ordeal.
Posts: 385
From: virginia beach, VA (hometown and wedding in NYC)
Re: I'm so upset
Posted on: 06/11/2008 03:09 PM
Queenbee I feel so bad for you but don't worry the show will still go on and be great.
My FSIL dropped out(in February(not that bad but she still dropped out)at the dang bridal shop talking about she never been to a wedding and she just wants to be in the audience. I let it slide. Then FH best friend hasn't been fitted yet so I have to come all the way to NY to hold his dang hand like a fu***** baby so he can get fitted and I have to pay for it because he is waiting for his tax return. The excuses are endless but you know what it's my day and the show will go on with or without him.
CHIL PUH-LEEZE....don't let NOBODY ruin you and your FH day! Two people not showing up will not doom your whole wedding because it is SO not about them. No matter what happens...like these ladies have said...it's about you and FH, as long as he's there in his tux and you in your FABULOUS dress looking gorgeous....and of course the minister/pastor....you day will be WONDERFULLY BLESSED!
For real I know how frustrating it can be when everything, every plan and everybody don't go the way you envision it going in your mind. But you can't let things like that stress you out, you are too close to one of the best days of your life....so focus on what you can do to fix the problem and if the problem can't be fixed....oh well....you keep it movin' and everything will turn out beautiful....
Posts: 385
From: virginia beach, VA (hometown and wedding in NYC)
Re: I'm so upset
Posted on: 06/11/2008 10:38 PM
Yes, Rosie he did.
I was thinking about not giving him his gift because of it but my mom said that would be wrong. I still may not give it to him. He would have made out better if he paid for his own tux because the gifts for the groomsmen are really nice.
WOW, you ladies have some wild stories... so far so good with my bridal party and I guess it's a good thing because I don't wanna have to go Bridezilla on anyone and i'm serious.
queenbee like all the ladies said your day will be fine just remember It's your day and no one can ruin it unless you let them. Pretty much it's their loss for not being a part of you union. Good luck sis
Girl my fh just walked in the house and informed me that his uncle one of his groomsmen has just been arrested for fighting with his girlfriend, and I am not going to lose one bit of sleep over it, I also over heard him talking to his best friend last night about the wedding and telling him how he think he will have to pay for his brothers suit because he is the only one who hasnt put anything on his suit. I am so sick of these bums. That's why we will be practicing the regular rehearsal which is plan A, and we will also practice a plan B just in case someone can't make it
At this point I am soooo ready to get this over with, and I refuse to stress any more over things I have no control over. I wouldnt care if no one shows up all that matter is my husband and I.
Yeah I remember this. You went through all kinds of hell before your wedding day.
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way. ~ Pablo Neruda
I'e been working for the Obama campaign since march 2007 and it has consumed every waking moment of my life. I've been working 7 days a week 12-16 hours a day every week since that time and this is the first day of my week long vacation. I am excited! The first thing I did was come here to check on you folks.
At the present time I am single and still going back and forth fighting battles with Mr. Lee. Fortunately this campaign has kept me so busy that I don't have the time or energy necessary to sustain a *real* relationship with him. We'll get it together one day when we're both ready to grow up.
I cannot believe you've been married a year already! Congratulations, my love. How's married life been?
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way. ~ Pablo Neruda
Posts: 1820
From: Tallahassee, FL (Originally Ft. Lauderdale, FL)
Re: I'm so upset
Posted on: 07/01/2008 10:12 AM
Married life is great. It has its UPS and downs...but for the most part it has been beautiful.....My husband is still a beast/caveman but he is wonderful what can I say! Good for you for working on the Obama campaign...I had totally forgot you were doing that and I am proud of you. I had no idea you and MrLee were still together, but I am sorry you all fight so much. I am glad you have such a worthwile distraction to keep you going....Please keep in touch and remember you are still in hearts....Stay in prayer and keep fighting the Good fight for Mr. Obama...
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