I am including a special part in the ceremony devoted to our kids. We don't have any together yet; he has a girl and so do I. I am still working on either the sand ceremony or giving them personalized necklaces. I think it would be beautiful to show the girls that they are just as important as me and my FH.
I'm including a wedding arras ceremony as part of my wedding. It's an honor to my hispanic heritage. Here's an explaination of how it works:
History
The custom of the coins originated in Spain. The madrina de arras holds the thirteen gold coins (arras) are given to the bride by the bridegroom, signifying he will support her. Often presented in ornate boxes or gift trays, this represents the bride�s dowry and holds good wishes for prosperity. These coins become a part of their family heirloom.
Groom�s pledge to the bride
The groom gives the bride thirteen gold coins as a symbol of his unquestionable trust and confidence. The symbolism, which may be explained by the officiant, is that the Groom recognizes his responsibility as a provider, and pledges his ability to support and care for her. Acceptance by the bride means taking that trust and confidence unconditionally with total dedication and prudence.
Why 13 coins?
The number 13 represents Christ and his 12 apostles.
How to use in ceremony
The coins are presented to the priest by a friend or relative (usually the purchaser). The priest then blesses the coins and hands them to the bride who places them in the groom's cupped hands at the beginning of the ceremony. The coins are then placed on a tray and handed to an assistant to be held until later in the ceremony. Near the end of the ceremony the box and coins are given to the priest who places the coins in the box and hands them to the groom.
The groom will then pour the coins into the bride's cupped hands and places the box on top. This represent his giving her control as his mistress of all his worldly goods. (Sometimes their hands are tied with a ribbon for this portion of the ceremony.)
In my case instead of getting tradition arras coins I decided to get coins that represent our backgrounds. SO the coins are comprised of Trinidadian, US, African, Dominican and Spain coins.
Thanks Pam. My father would love to see that and he doesn't know I'm doing it. Plus it's not a normal thing that occurs in Black weddings so it will be a nice touch for everyone involved. I plan on getting a shadowbox for my bouquet, the coins, pictures and other momentos from the day.
FH and I had a tribute ceremony to his mother and my son who are both deceased where my sister read a poem and we both laid flowers down on the pew in their seats; we did this right after I walked down the isle (FH met me at the end of the isle) and we stood there and did this tribute before we walked up to the pulpit; also we did the blended family ceremony where FH presented my son with a medallion necklace; everyone commented on how beautiful they thought both ceremonies were!
A Kitten,
That's a great idea! I am black but my fiance is Mexican and we are going to incorporate the arras tradition in our wedding too. But I like your idea of mixing it up. Thanks for sharing!
I am planning on incorporating the tasting ceremony into my wedding. the only thing is i am trying to find the wording that they use, or a poem that someone can read explaining what the ceremony is about
We had a lighting of a memorial candle in honor of my mother, and a red rose was placed in the seat where she would have sat. We also had a rose ceremony in place of the unity candle. I just wanted to do something different from the usual unity candle ceremony that I often see at weddings, so we decided to try the rose ceremony, and everyone loved it!
Thanks duchessv! I'm hispanic/black so blending elements from both cultures is especially important. Don't try and do too much or it'll look overdone. Perhaps in your case in addition to the Arras, at your reception you could have Mexican dancers there. Welcome to the board and good luck on your wedding plans!
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